The Haute Critique

Why? I mean why even give it a try? Well, with the huge numbers of players that are toking, it seemed like an investigation was warranted.

And it is stellar with one enormous caveat, but we will get to that after these messages.

While basketball players are almost all genetic abnormalities, the game still happens close to human scale. No pads, skates, bats, gloves, helmets, or racquets. Close to human scale, doesn’t mean pedestrian. Everything is amped up, just a bit. And that includes the pure aesthetics of the game itself.

Regular season NBA can be tiresome. With the playoffs, every facet comes into focus. And the power of their strides and their emotions infect their fellow stoners on the couch. You realize that at least some of the inspired plays are realizations these millionaire mutants had burning a spliff and schooling their entourage on the xbox in the back of their Escalade. And their personal style. Look at the Chris ‘The Birdman’ Anderson in Denver and tell me he’s never been more than a mile high.

Even squeaky clean LeBron has his signature puff of smoke before each game. And the broadcasters know too. Taco Bell. An electronics company, Haier (pronounced ‘Higher”), and then there is Sprite. Last year’s dada-ist LeBron commercials have been replaced with a tale of sweaty suicidal urbanites. They throw their bodies together and explode in a refreshing spray, soaking their friends in their liquid martyrdom.

And while these diversions aren’t intrusive and are sometimes fun, it is the commercials that keep this stoners recommendation of the NBA Playoffs guarded. Some of the ad spots are heart wrenching buzz kills, like the ones from Hyundai. Light one up and see for yourself. If you can ignore Madison Avenue pot holes, it is a slam dunk.

(writer’s note – sportscasters love puns, so if these puns harshed your mellow, probably best to skip it.)

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